Dildo machines occupy a small niche. I’ve never met any girls who actually own one. Most masturbating girls will use the regular hand-held dildos. The Sybian saddle (seen on the Howard Stern show) is not cheap at $1300.

Dildo machines are mechanized pistons attached to a latex cock. I think the guys who build these things start off tinkering with train sets, move up to taking apart car engines and then somehow get sidetracked to building masturbation gizmos for women. These machines can cost thousands of dollars. Only chicks who have lots of money, or their husbands, can afford them.

We borrowed one such machine from a company called KensTwistedMind.com in exchange for promotional consideration. One of the recipients of this arrangement was the utra-sexy Crystal Gunns, who agreed to try out the F-Machine in a video. At first, Crystal was not a fan of sex toys. She rarely used dildos and vibrators. She began playing with them in her SCORE shoots. “Honestly, I didn’t think I was going to get through my first dildo video because I was so nervous, but the second one was easier and a lot of fun,” Crystal said. As time went on, Crystal became more comfortable using them.

So Crystal decides that she’ll go ahead and try this crazy machine from KensTwistedMind.com. When you hear a name like that, there’s going to be some hesitation. Crystal is very much a traditional girl at heart. She’s not, and never was, a super-wild, child.

This fuck machine has a speed controller that Crystal keeps a firm hold of during the video. Turned up all the way, this thing can really haul ass. Crystal keeps the pace slow and easy. At some points, you can see that it’s making her orgasm. It goes deepest into her pussy when it’s pistoning into her from behind.

We only shot a few videos with Ken’s fuck machine (Charlee Chase used it, too) before returning it a few months later. It’s a novelty for sure. All the scenes went into a DVD called The F-Machine Girls, now sold-out.

I know a few porn babes who could probably wreck the F-Machine. I’m sure Naughty Alysha could.